What scares you?

Do you have any childhood fears? Before any answer creeps into your head, I want you to dismiss any fears of losing your job, the death of a loved one or even your own death. I want you to start thinking about that shadow over by the dresser when you are trying to go to sleep at night. Well, we all have those shadows, but it's what our brain tells us it is that really defines what we're scared of, right? Is it a witch? Is it an alien? Is it Jack the Ripper? They all take a similar shape, but what we convince ourselves it is what really makes us scared.

I have two basic fears which materialize in two ways. That shadow in the corner? Yeah, that's a witch. That brush of air against the hairs on my neck? That's a spider. I guess, psychologically, I could say I'm afraid of women who are furious with me. That would explain the witch. Everyone who knows me knows that I get violent when I'm tickled. It kind of explains the spiders. It's more than that though. I'm not one of those people who go around telling themselves that they don't give a damn. If a woman is or has been furious with me, I can pretty much turn them off with my mental radar so quick that I barely register what they're even mad at. When I asked, "What's wrong?", it's because I turned down all of the shouting and decided to come back once things got calm. Spiders? Little known fact about me - I used to be an exterminator. I worked for Terminix. To say I have killed a few spiders in my time would be an understatement.

A good storyteller can overcome all of the mental barriers we've put up since our childhood. They can remind you of every night you spent under your blankets as a child believing, against all odds, that if you stay under the blanket and stay quiet, this demonic force of evil will give up and leave you alone. A good storyteller can make you scratch yourself absentmindedly as you read about the colony of fire ants covering the crying child entirely. Even writing that last sentence kicked in my "defender of all children" program.

The true masters of horror found a way to get inside every readers head and plant irrational ideas which scare the daylights out of them. We all have different fears, but the master of horror can get you scared of something you're normally not afraid of for a period of time. I'm not scared of sharks. I'm fascinated by them. I love sharks. A master of horror though, can change my love into fear for a few hours though. After Jaws, I walked away from the movie very angry. I knew that there are now going to be more people who would be fine with the slaughter of these wonderful creatures. I also give a nod to Peter Benchley and Steven Spielberg for being so masterful at their craft. It kind of makes you wonder what would happen if they put their talents towards making your scared of other things you're normally not scared of, right? America loves cars, right? Each household will generally have more than one car, which shows the national devotion.

Ever heard of a book called Christine? What about Maximum Overdrive?

We all know about Southern Hospitality in America right? Ever see Deliverance?